Graced Recipe
Any relationship that prompts you to go against the instructions of God which is CHASTITY, should not be kept.
Choose obedience over self will.
WORD TO REMEMBER
"My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not."
#Proverbs1:10
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#complimentsoftheseason
#loveyou
TODAY'S RECIPE
Why the serious preparation for wedding without godly virtues?
Marriage exposes!
Work on yourself and don't dump all the blame on God.
Prayer without right knowledge embarrasses.
WORD COUNT
"It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman."
#Proverbs:21:19
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#Godcares
#blessedweekend
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
TODAY'S RECIPE
Don't be ashamed of the truth you believe. Preach it, proclaim it, live it and prove it beyond reasonable doubt.
I believe in Sexual Purity, before and within marriage.
This generation must believe it with me.
WORD COUNT
"Let your light so shine before men that they may see your moral excellence and your praiseworthy, noble, and good deeds and [aa]recognize and honor and praise and glorify your Father Who is in heaven."
#john5:16
#anniesentcares
#gracedrecipe@3
#goodmorning
#mercifulwednesday
TODAY'S RECIPE
What you commit your time, mind, and whole being to, can be easily sensed by those around you.
Commitment to any Relationship leading to marriage outside the knowledge of the Pioneer (of marriage,) is a wrong commitment.
WORD COUNT
Be not wise in thine own eyes...
#proverbs3:7a
#actonthetruth
#walkinlove
#anniesentcares
#gracedrecipe@3yrs
#goodmorning
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it.
TODAY'S RECIPE
Divine instructions attimes appears as foolishness. It may not make sense.
Obedience precedes Manifestation; manifestation brings Glorification.
Any relationship that kicks purity is a glory-killer.
Obey God not bf/gf.
#John:2:5
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedweek
WORD COUNT
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.
TODAY'S RECIPE
You are 17years old, He is 28. He promised to marry you, on the condition that you sleep with him and show him true love till you finish your education.
After your two years of faithful service, you lost contacts; just for you to see his wedding picture on his Facebook page.
Don't cry, it's not heart break, it's called REWARD OF FOOLISHNESS.
How many faithful service like that will you offer before you wake up, discover your divine purpose and fulfil it?
God still loves you.
#SOS2:7
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedweekend
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
Every purpose is established by counsel: and with good advice make war.
TODAY'S RECIPE
Never ignore godly counsels. It helps grow and fulfilled.
Watch who you call friend, mentor and counselor.
#Proverbs20:18
#relationshipmatters
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedthursday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
'Receive my instruction, and not silver; and knowledge rather than choice gold.'
TODAY'S RECIPE
Ladies, knowledge and obedience to godly counsel is better than riches and wealth.
Knowledge begats wealth beyond riches.
The future of a man cannot be determined using instinct.
#Proverbs8:10
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
Beat your plowshares into swords and your pruninghooks into spears: let the weak say, I am strong.
TODAY'S RECIPE
The face of adversity is always scary. Why look at the situation of others to compare yours?
In weakness, receive strength to stand, fight and win.
Be strong & let no relationship rubbish you also.
#Joel3:10
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedweek
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
' Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies.'
TODAY'S RECIPE
You don't have to get to crossroads before you hand over the wheel of your Relationship, and marriage to God.
He cares.
#Psalm:27:11
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Sexual Purity lifestyle is possible.
Encourage yourself, "I can do it no matter what is happening in my environment."
Your obedience should not be subject to close monitoring but self discipline.
#Philippians:2:12
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy."
TODAY'S RECIPE
I believe in Sexual Purity because God commanded it. I choose to obey God not my flesh.
Tell the world why you believe in Sexual Purity if you do.
#1Peter1:16
#anniesentcares
#wspd
#wspd2018
#worldsexualpurityday
#november14
#sexualpurity
#sexualpurityacademy
#spa
#wallfoundation
#thesent
WORD COUNT
"And Moses verily was faithful in all his house, as a servant, for a testimony of those things which were to be spoken after."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Egypt was dirty but Moses was faithful.
Your environment may be corrupt; by determination, the fear of God & good knowledge, you can achieve a great Testimony.
Embrace sexual purity.
#Hebrews:3:5
#anniesentcares
#wspd
#wspd2018
#anticipateWSPD
#worldsexualpurityday
#november14
#sexualpurity
#sexualpurityacademy
#spa
#wallfoundation
WORD COUNT
"There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death."
TODAY'S RECIPE
The way of sexual impurity seems right and enjoyable but the loss attached is irrecoverable.
Ask Dinah.
Be wise.
#Proverbs:14:12
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#wspd
#wspd2018
#anticipateWSPD
#worldsexualpurityday
#november14
#sexualpurity
#sexualpurityacademy
#spa
#wallfoundation
WORD COUNT
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
TODAY'S RECIPE
The happenings in our generation does not encourage sexual purity but you can do it.
Choose your friends carefully and be determined to sacrifice the pleasure of few seconds that can distrupt destiny for a great price of Glory and praise.
It worth it.
#1Corinthians6:18
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#wspd
#nov14
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
Yea, they shall sing in the ways of the LORD: for great is the glory of the LORD.
Today's Recipe
Ignore condemnations from friends because you made up your mind to live sexually pure before and after marriage.
You are not the first and will not be the last beneficiary of it's glory.
Sex is worth waiting for.
#Psalm:138:5
#wspd
#nov14
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
WORD COUNT
"But we are not of them who draw back unto perdition; but of them that believe to the saving of the soul."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Guide your heart and soul by cautioning new beliefs and doctrines from penetrating.
#Hebrews:10:39
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Trust ye not in a friend, put ye not confidence in a guide: keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lieth in thy bosom."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Cast all your cares not on man. It can limit God's blessings.
Woe is anyone who places man above His maker-God.
Don't idolize your partner/friend, man is limited.
#Micah:7:5
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Don't be caught unawares; the whole essence of living is to PLEASE God.
Daily checkmate is necessary.
Also Scrutinize all your relationships, are they helping you out.
#Ecclesiastes12:13
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedday
WORD COUNT
Righteousness exalts a nation: but SIN is a reproach to any people.
TODAY'S RECIPE
You are a nation with nations in you.
Living right is not only for you but also for the unborn nations in you.
Righteousness exalts to the height beyond human imagination.
#Proverbs:14:34
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blesseddayahead
WORD COUNT
"The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Integrity at heart will keep you.
#Proverbs11:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
Blessed Week
WORD COUNT
"Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations."
TODAY'S RECIPE
How can I discover purpose without Right Relationship with the One who Ordained my purpose? (God)
How can I discover purpose without studying Purpose Manual? (His Word)
How can I fulfill purpose without fellowship with the One who will lead me to the Land of Fulfilment? (His Spirit)
My profession, passion, and even carreer, may not be close to MY ORIGINAL PURPOSE OF CREATION.
It's Discovery Time, Wake Up.
#jeremiah1:5
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#blessedweekend
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"I charge you, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, by the roes, and by the hinds of the field, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please."
TODAY'S RECIPE
It is wrong to accuse Love for your heart breaks.
Check yourself, look inwards; outside that Relationship what else do you have?
Self discovery and purpose fulfilment assist with answers.
#SOS2:7
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#fulfilpurpose
#blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Situation may pose threats; life sometimes appears as if it will end. Boy/girlfriend may disappoint you.
Who do run to for succor? Family, friends, or clubhouse?
Counsel may come from experienced or inexperienced ones.
Call upon God and take godly counsel.
#Jeremiah:33:3
#dailyrecipe
#blessedday
#anniesentcares
Word Count
"He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.''
TODAY'S RECIPE
" My friends can't influence me, I am highly determined to live right."
If the above statement is your slogan, consult King Solomon and Dinah.
#Proverbs:13:20
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedweekend
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"...Then shalt thou understand the fear of the LORD, and find the knowledge of God."
TODAY'S RECIPE
"It like s/he loves me and we'll be compatible."
Why the assumption?
Define ALL relationships especially with an opposite sex. Flock together with like-minded ones who fears God and respect you.
#proverbs2:5
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"With him is an arm of flesh; but with us is the LORD our God to help us, and to fight our battles..."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Human match-making may be good; divine match-making is the Best.
Totally depend on God.
#2Chronicles32:8
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#blessed
#Jesusisreal
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: but if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it."
TODAY'S RECIPE
It is not Marriage that perfects you. Work on yourself before marriage.
Be ready to take responsibilities and blames.
Walk with the wise.
Jesus is the wisdom of God, allow Him.
#Proverbs9:12
#goodmorning
ANNIESENTCARES
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them;"
TODAY'S RECIPE
It's a new month. It's the last quarter of the year 2018.
Count the cost...
What are the achievements so far this year?
If there is any relationship you are and nothing positive is attributable to it since this year began, I'll advise you flee.
#Ecclesiastes12:1
#RememberGod
#Anniesentcares
#goodmorning
Happy New month
Month of double grace
WORD COUNT
"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body."
TODAY'S RECIPE
When you continue to give excuses for fornication and adultery, with the believe that God understands, then check the position of your heart, its likely far from the TRUTH.
#1Corinthians6:18
#ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
WORD COUNT
"Meats for the belly, and the belly for meats: but God shall destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body."
TODAY'S RECIPE
There is no exemption to fornication, whether you will end up marrying the person or not.
Do not edit the commandment of God to suit your selfish desire.
Flee Fornication!
Shikenah!
Your body belongs to God!
#1Corinthians6:13
ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
Have a blessed day
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
'Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.'
TODAY'S RECIPE
More than one million copies of bridal magazines are sold each month, focusing mainly on wedding ceremonies, honeymoons, and home furnishings—but not on marriage itself.
The Best Manual on Marriage is written by God, the pioneer of Marriage and that is the Bible.
Although, men edited it into books, poems, songs and movies as inspired by the Holy Spirit.
#psalm119:105
#searchtheword
ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
Blessed day
WORD COUNT
Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts.
TODAY'S RECIPE
Align your heart with the word of God and your actions will bring peace.
#psalm139:23
#goodmorning
#blessedweek
#anniesentcares
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word Count
''Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you."
TODAY'S RECIPE
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man commits is without the body...your body is God's Temple. Keep it and reverence it.
Don't join the multitude to do what appears pleasurable but sinful.
Come out from them!
#1Corinthians618
ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
WORD COUNT
''Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you."
TODAY'S RECIPE
As a special breed, your heart must be guided with all diligence and not as a breakable toy by a man or woman.
Obedience to divine instructions guides the heart from wrong decisions especially, relationships.
COME OUT AND SEPARATE
#2Corinthians617
ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
Word Count:
'If the iron be blunt, and he do not whet the edge, then must he put to more strength: but wisdom is profitable to direct.'
TODAY'S RECIPE
You are in a relationship with no positive impact on you, tell me why you are still there.
Each time you meet those friends, you keep going back to God asking for forgiveness.
For how long?
Come out from among them and separate.
#Ecclesiastes:10:10
ANNIESENTCARES
Good morning
THINGS I WISH I'D KNOWN BEFORE I GOT MARRIED (Gary Chapman)
In this book, I have shared with you what I wish someone had told me before I got married. If Karolyn and I had discussed the issues I have raised on these pages, our first years of marriage would have been much easier. Since we did not discuss these issues, our marriage was filled with conflicts, misunderstandings, and frustration. I know the feeling of being married and miserable; of thinking, “I’ve married the wrong woman.” I reasoned that surely if I had married the “right one,” it would not be this difficult. Yes, we eventually found answers to our frustrations and resolution to our conflicts.
We learned how to listen to each other empathetically and understand feelings and desires and to reach workable solutions. For many years we have had a loving, supportive, satisfying marital relationship and haveinvested our lives in helping other couples discover the same.
It is my desire that this book will help thousands of couples have that kind of marriage, without the years of pain and struggle weexperienced.
If you are single and not currently involved in any relationship, I hope the ideas of this bookwill be tucked away in your mind for future reference. You now have a more realistic idea of whatneeds to be considered before you make the decision to get married. When you begin to feel the“tingles” for someone, I hope that you will take this book off the shelf and let it be a guide indeveloping a healthy relationship and a wise decision on whether or not to say, “I do!”
For those of you who are in a committed relationship, I hope that this book will be yourtrusted companion as you get to know each other better. I encourage you to discuss the topics openlyand honestly, and seek to be realistic about what you discover. If so, I believe you will make a wisedecision about whether or not you should get married.
For those who are already officially or unofficially “engaged,” I hope that you will dig deeply intothe issues I have raised. I encourage you not simply to read the chapters but to answer the questionsand follow the suggestions I have made at the end of each chapter. Some of you may discover thatyour engagement is premature; that you really did not know each other well enough to make thatdecision. If so, I hope you will have the courage to be honest with each other, accept theembarrassment this may bring, and either postpone or break your engagement.
I assure you that abroken engagement, while painful, is not nearly as painful as a divorce three years later.
If, on the other hand, you conclude that you old enough in common to build a successful marriage,then your discussion of these issues will better prepare you to make that dream a reality. I genuinelybelieve that if couples will thoroughly discuss the content of this book, they will enter marriage witha much more realistic view of how to have a successful marriage.
A few years ago, a survey revealed that 87 percent of single adults between the ages of twenty andthirty affirmed, “I want to have one marriage that will last for a lifetime.”
They have seen theirparents divorce and felt the pain of abandonment. That is not what they desire to replicate. Thetragedy is that many of them have no idea how to reach the aspiration of a lifelong positive marriagerelationship. It is my desire that this book will provide them with that information.
#Knowledgeisgood
#seekgoodcounsel
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#blessedday
#songsofvictory
#dominionera
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
This personality difference can be easily observed in the dating relationship if the couple is looking for it. However, most couples are not. If the organizer sees the spontaneous personality of his dating partner, he will likely admire it and respond positively to her spontaneous ideas. If the spontaneous person sees the organizational skills of the partner, she will most certainly admire the trait and perhaps even express her appreciation. However, if the couple can be a bit more realistic and acknowledge the potential conflicts in this personality difference and discuss how they might handle such conflicts after marriage, they may save themselves the trauma of being shocked by personality clashes after marriage. The fact that you have acknowledged the potential conflicts and
discussed possible solutions will make it much easier for you to discover such solutions when the inevitable conflict arises.
Because personality differences are so profound and because they strongly affect our behavior, I encourage all couples who are seriously contemplating marriage to fill out a personality profile. Few things will better prepare you for the inevitable conflicts in marriage like understanding each other’s personality patterns.
RATING SCALE
On a scale of 1–10, rate yourself on the following personality traits. 10 means extremely highand 1 means extremely low.
a. Optimistic
b. Pessimistic
c. Neat
d. Messy
e. Babbling Brook
f. Dead Sea
g. Pointer
h. Painter
i. Aggressive
j. Passive
k. Logical
l. Intuitive
m. Organizer
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#garychapman
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#blessedday
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
The Organizer and the Free Spirit
The organizer will give attention to the details while the spontaneous person—the “free spirit”—thinks, “The details will take care of themselves.” Organizers are planners; they will spend months in preparation for a trip out of town. They will check three different websites, looking for the best airfare. They will make sure the rental car has GPS. They will make hotel reservations weeks in advance. They will give similar attention to where they will eat and what they will do, and certainly, they will make sure that they pack the right equipment. The spontaneous person waits until the night
before the trip and says, “Why don’t we go to the coast instead of the mountains? The sun is so beautiful and the weather is wonderful.” This sends the organizer into a tailspin and the vacation becomes torture.
Before marriage, Beth was impressed with Trent’s organizational skills. “You check your online bank balance every day? That’s amazing!” However, after marriage she is asking, “You want me to write down every expense? That’s impossible. No one does that.” Trent, of course, quickly shows her his little notebook with every expense accurately recorded. To him, it’s simply a matter of being responsible.
Trent will also load the dishwasher in a very organized manner. Plates, bowls, glasses, and silverware—all in their appropriate positions. Beth on the other hand will likely load the dishwasher like she loads the washing machine. Her objective is simply to get the door closed—the dishwasher will take care of the rest. Trent will be quick to point out the chipped plates and broken glasses that
are the result of her whimsical attitude.
In my own marriage, it took me several years to realize that Karolyn would never load a dishwasher the way I loaded it. She simply was not wired with that ability. All of my lectures about why she should not cradle two spoons with peanut butter between them fell on deaf ears. I learned the hard way that life is more than a few chipped dishes, broken glasses, and dirty spoons. I had to give her the freedom to be who she is and, in turn, she freely relinquished the task of loading the
dishwasher. If I must rush off to an evening meeting, she will gladly do the job and I will accept the results.
Trent will also pay the bills in a very organized, methodical manner. If he is out of town for a fewdays on a business trip, he will expect Beth to have the bills stacked neatly on his desk when he returns. However, chances are Beth will not remember what she did with the mail or even if she brought it inside the house. He may find the bills in the car, on the floor, or under the couch cushion.
He is amazed that anyone could be so irresponsible. Beth is equally amazed that anyone could be so rigid. This personality difference has the potential for heated conflicts.
Till tomorrow, stay blessed.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#awesomeweek
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
Professors and Dancers
These personality differences often go undiscovered and undiscussed before marriage.
During the courtship phase of the relationship, decisions are often made simply because he and she want to please each other. After marriage, when life gets serious and real, this desire to please each other is not as natural.
When differences emerge, the logical thinker will seek to press the intuitive thinker into having logical reasons for their position. This is expecting and demanding the impossible.
The intuitive person will never process life with the logic of the professor.
If you try to force each other into your own personality mold, you may spend a lifetime in conflict.
We must recognize that logical and intuitive thinking are both legitimate ways of processing life.
We must focus not on the process whereby we reach our conclusions but on finding conclusions with which both of us can agree.
The principles we discussed in Chapter Four on how to resolve disagreements without arguing will be extremely helpful to couples who have this personality differences.
May God help you, Amen.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#sweetweekend
We will be through with this book next week by God's grace. Thanks for following.
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com.
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
Professors and Dancers
Some people are extremely logical in their reasoning. They progress through rational steps and reach what to them is a logical conclusion. Other people simply know in their heart what is right in a given situation. They cannot tell you why or how they reached that conclusion; they simply know that it is the right decision.
I have sometimes called the logical thinker the professor. For the professor, everything must be reasoned out. “We must have logical reasons for everything we do. If it is not logical, we shouldn’t do it.” The intuitive person is more like the dancer. “We don’t need logical reasons for everything we do. We do some things simply because we enjoy them. I don’t know why. Do I always have to know why? I want to do it just because.” Before marriage the professor was enamored with the intuitive wisdom of the dancer while the dancer was proud of the professor’s logic.
However, after marriage the professor is slowly driven insane by the same illogical behavior, while the dancer wonders how she can continue living with a person so obsessed with reason.
One husband said to his wife,
“Trish, listen to me. The walls are not dirty; they don’t need painting again. Don’t you understand that?”
His wife responded,
“Yes, I understand that. But I don’t want green walls any longer.”
The professor has a difficult time making decisions based on desire. The dancer cannot imagine why anyone would want to be held in the prison of logic.
If you try to force each other into your own personality mold, you may spend a lifetime in conflict.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#blessedday
We will be through with this book next week by God's grace. Thanks for following.
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com.
WORD COUNT
"For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee."
TODAY'S RECIPE
A man cannot rise above the level of his thoughts. Renew your mind always with the word of God.
Every measure of progress that a man has experienced started from the mind.
When we pray for God to change our circumstances, we must learn to first change our thoughts. It is when our prayers agree with our thoughts that the prayers are answered.
For example, if you are believing for a hitch-free home, configure your mind to believe in it's possibility despite the noise around.
Anniesentcares
#Proverbs:23:7
#yearofvictory
#renewedmind
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
(Quite a long Chapter but not too worry, we are almost done.)
Are these traits observable in the relationship stage?
The answer is yes, but often they are never discussed. The passive person tends to simply go along with anything the aggressive person wants to do. They enjoy the adventure and are caught up in the excitement of being in love. They will seldom express opposition to the aggressive person’s ideas. When the two of them walk into a room, the aggressive person will assess what needs to be done and take charge to make it happen while the passive person stands by, perhaps talking to a friend, waiting to see what the evening will bring. The aggressive person will often engage the passive person by asking them to do something specific to
move the cause along.
Because they are in love with the aggressor, the passive personality often complies and may even feel good about having been a part of the process.
While there is nothing innately wrong with either of these personality traits, they do hold the potential for irritation after marriage. When the heightened emotions of being in love have faded, the passive person will be more resistant to the request of the aggressor and may feel that they are being manipulated or controlled.
The aggressor may feel frustrated and even angry with the hesitation of the passive personality. It is certainly possible for these two individuals to build a successful marriage, but it requires the aggressor to be empathetic and understanding of the passive personality.
He must take time to hear the concerns of the passive individual and even to realize the assets that they bring to the marriage. For example, “looking before one leaps” is always a good idea. The passive person is far more likely than the aggressor to be “looking.” On the other hand, the passive person must allow the aggressive person to use her strengths and let her leap before it is too late. If you cannot conscientiously leap with her, then hold the rope while she does so.
Together you will accomplish much in life, if you learn how to complement each other, rather than be competitors.
If you can discuss this personality difference before marriage and gain some experience in working together as a team, you are far more likely to make this difference an asset rather than a liability once you are married.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#gloriousweek
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gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com.
WORD COUNT
"But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him."
TODAY'S RECIPE
The Miracles/testimonies necessary for our peaceful and happy livelihood require PROCESSING TIME (Patience).
Relax and be vigilant to divine Timing. Don't work out any relationship with your brain by portraying who you are not.
The best is yet to come.
#1Corinthians2:9
#anniesentcares
#goodmorning
#wordfromthemoon😁😀😀😀
Enjoy your weekend
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
Passives and Aggressives
The old adage says, “Some people read history; others make it.” Often these people are married to each other. The aggressive husband or wife believes that each day is a new opportunity to advance the cause. They will aggressively pursue what they want, what they believe to be right, or what they think should happen. They will go to all ends, they will turn every stone, and they will do everything humanly possible to accomplish their goals in life. On the other hand, the passive person will spend time thinking, analyzing, wondering “What if?” and waiting for something good to happen. Their theme is, “Everything comes to him who waits.”
Before marriage, these traits made them seem compatible. The aggressive partner found it comforting to observe the calm, cool, and collected nature of the other person. They liked the stable, predictable nature of the one they loved. The passive person was pleased to have someone make plans and chart courses for their future. They admired the accomplishments of their aggressive lover.
After marriage, the couple often finds these traits divisive. The aggressive partner keeps trying to push the passive partner into action. “Come on; we can make this happen” is their mantra. On the other hand, the passive partner keeps saying, “Let’s wait. There might be a better opportunity later.
Don’t get so excited. Everything is going to work out.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
These differences are also seen in the way people tell stories. The Babbling Brook tends to be a painter. If they are telling you an experience they have had, they will paint a beautiful, detailed picture of the event. They will tell you whether it was cloudy or the sun was shining, which way the wind was blowing, what kind of flowers were in the background, and how many people were standing on the other side of the parking lot.
On the other hand, the Dead Sea tends to be a pointer. If they were telling the same experience, it would be much shorter with fewer details. They simply “get to the point.” They are bottom-line communicators. Often in a marriage, the pointer will find it very difficult to listen to the long and detailed account of the painter.
They will sometimes interrupt and
say “Could you just get to the point?” However, when the painter is listening to the pointer, they will often ask questions trying to glean more details so they have a better picture of the pointer’s story.
The painter will always be a painter and the pointer will always be a pointer. These personality patterns of speech are not likely to change, nor is one better than another.
However, if we understand these personality differences, we are less likely to try to change each other after we are married. The Dead Sea will never become a Babbling Brook. So the person who is married to a Dead Sea must be content to live with a person who will not readily share all of their thoughts and feelings. Most Dead Seas are open to questions and are willing to share more if the Babbling Brook will ask those questions.
The Dead Sea is not willfully withholding information; they simply have no compulsion to share all of their thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
While the Dead Sea may be content to listen to the constant talk of the Babbling Brook, he or she may sometimes long for moments of silence. That is why they sometimes withdraw to the computer or other activities. The Babbling Brook must understand. They are not being rejected by the Dead Sea.
The Dead Sea is simply longing for a more contemplative climate. When these personality differencesare discussed before marriage, they are far less likely to be troublesome after marriage.
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#yearofvictory
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
When the Dead Sea Weds a Babbling Brook
Another area of personality differences is related to speech. Some people talk freely about everything. Others are more thoughtful, introspective, and less likely to share their thoughts and feelings. I have often referred to the latter as the “Dead Sea” and the former as the “Babbling Brook.”
In the nation of Israel, the Dead Sea receives waters from the Jordan River. But the Dead Sea goesnowhere. Many people have that kind of personality. They can receive all kinds of thoughts, feelings,
and experiences throughout the day. They have a large reservoir in which they store the experiences of the day and are perfectly happy not to talk. In fact, if you say to a Dead Sea, “What’s wrong? Why aren’t you talking tonight?” they’ll likely say, “Nothing’s wrong. What makes you think something is wrong?” The Dead Sea is being perfectly honest. He or she is content not to talk.
On the other hand, the Babbling Brook is the individual for whom whatever comes into the eye gateor the ear gate comes out the mouth gate—usually in less than sixty seconds. Whatever they see,whatever they hear, they tell. In fact, if no one is at home they will call someone on the telephone andask, “Do you know what I just heard?” They have no reservoir; whatever they experience, it spills over and they tell it to someone.
Often a Dead Sea will marry a Babbling Brook. Before marriage, the differences are viewed asattractive. For example, while dating, the Dead Sea can relax. He or she does not have to think “How will I get the conversation started?” or, “How will I keep the conversation flowing?” All they have to do is sit there, nod their head, and say, “Uh-huh.” The Babbling Brook will fill up the evening. On theother hand, the Babbling Brook finds the Dead Sea equally attractive because Dead Seas are theworld’s best listeners. However, five years after marriage, the Babbling Brook may be saying,“We’ve been married five years and I don’t know her.” At the same time, the Dead Sea may besaying, “I know him too well. I wish he would stop the flow and give me a break.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
Sub-topic: Neatniks and Slobs
Then there are the Neatnik and the Slob. “I’ve never known anyone as sloppy as Ben,” said Alicia.
How many wives have said this about their husbands less than a year after their wedding?
Interestingly, before marriage this never bothered Alicia. Oh, she may have noticed that the car wassometimes messy or that his apartment was not as neat as she would have had it, but somehow she
concluded that “Ben is a more relaxed person than I am. That’s good; I like that. I need to loosen up alittle.”
Ben, on the other hand, looked at Alicia and found an angel. “Isn’t it wonderful that Alicia isalways so tidy? Now I don’t have to worry about keeping everything clean because she will take careof that.” However, three years later he is being bombarded with verbal stones of condemnation towhich he responds, “I don’t understand why you would get so upset over a few dishes left out.”
Some people do live by the motto “A place for everything and everything in its place.”
Otherpeople have no compulsion to put away their tools, clothes, used coffee mugs, or anything else. Afterall, they may use them again in a week or two. They reason, “Why would you want to waste timepicking up dirty clothes every day? Leave them on the floor until it’s time to wash them. They aren’tgoing anywhere and they don’t bother me.”
Yes, we are wired differently and have difficulty understanding why the other person would notsee it our way. This personality difference is not hard to discover; it simply requires that during therelationship, you keep your eyes open to reality. Look at his car and his apartment and you will knowwhether he is a Neatnik or a Slob. Look at her kitchen and her bedroom closet and you will also knowwhich personality pattern is natural for her. If the two of you fall into the same category, you willeither have an immaculate home or a place where you have to step over the clutter. But both of youwill be happy. If you fall into different categories, then now is the time for negotiation. Face realityand discuss who will be responsible for what after you are married in order to keep some level ofemotional sanity. If she is willing to pick up his dirty clothes daily and put them in the laundry hamperas his mother did when he was in high school, this is fine.
However, if she expects him to be moreresponsible, then he must be willing to change or else hire his mother to come over daily to pick uphis clothes. Certainly a satisfactory solution can be negotiated—but the time to start negotiation is before marriage.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
The answer to this personality difference lies in understanding and accepting the differences, and not condemning each other for being who they are.
They must then negotiate a method of honoring each other’s personality. One such plan may be to agree on a dollar amount that the couple would have in secure investments before the optimist would engage in high-risk investments. Once this minimum level of investments is in place, they could agree on a dollar amount that he could invest in a higher-risk investment with the understanding that if he lost it all, she would not condemn him. On the other hand, if the investment is successful, she commends him for his investment skills and together they celebrate their financial success.
If a courting couple is willing to negotiate these kinds of arrangements before they get married, they will save themselves many unnecessary arguments over how they will handle the finances. The same principle is true in scores of other areas in which the pessimist and the optimist are likely to have very different views about the action that should be taken.
Understanding, accepting, and negotiating personality differences are essential in building a foundation for a healthy marriage.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got Married
Two years after marriage when he suggests that the two of them go rock climbing, she stronglyresists the idea. Not only is she unwilling, she also resists the idea of him going alone or with friends.
She can envision herself being a widow and cannot understand why he would be willing to take sucha risk. On the other hand, he is totally blown away by her response. He wonders what happened toher spirit of adventure. Why is she being such a killjoy?
Because they failed to discover and discuss this personality difference before marriage, they findthemselves embroiled in a conflict that neither of them understands. In reality, they are both simplybeing who they are, an optimist and a pessimist. The problem is neither of them knew who the otherperson was before they got married. The euphoria of the dating experience blinded them to thispersonality difference. Had they discussed this difference before marriage, he would have realizedthat she would never be a rock climber, nor would she ever go skydiving with him. He would alsohave realized that if he chose to do such things, he would do so in the face of great resistance from hiswife.�
This personality difference is likely to create conflicts in the area of money management. Theoptimist will tend to be an adventurous investor, willing to take huge levels of risk with the hope ofpositive results. On the other hand, the pessimist will want to invest in more stable and securemarkets. They will spend sleepless nights if the spouse pulls them into a high-risk investment. And if
the investment goes south, the pessimist will blame the optimist for taking undue risks with theirmoney. The optimist is likely to see the pessimist as being non-supportive of their ideas and thus,blame the spouse for “holding them back” from success.
#Amos3:3
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gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Half Full or Half Empty?
Let’s look at some of the other personality differences that often go undiscovered and undiscussedbefore marriage. The pessimist and the optimist are often attracted to each other. The optimist sees
the glass as half full; the pessimist sees it as half empty. The optimist sees the possibilities while thepessimist sees the problems. Each of us has a basic leaning in one direction or the other, but we areoften unaware of this aspect of our personality.
In the early stage of the relationship, we each assume that the other person views theworld as we view it. Because we are each enamored with the other and seeking to accommodate each other, this personality difference may not be apparent. For example, the optimist tends to be a risk taker becausehe is convinced in his own mind that everything will turn out fine. Thus, he may suggest that the two of
them go bungee jumping. The pessimist by nature does not want to take risks because she assumes thatthe worst could happen. Therefore, she would never have entertained the thought of bungee jumping,but because she admires and trusts her lover, she is willing to do something she would never have
done on her own. The optimist is thrilled to be in relationship with someone who is willing to be adventuresome,
while never realizing that she has gone far beyond her emotional comfort zone.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
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#yearofvictory
#getknowledge
#favouredday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
A morning person will never become a night person, and a night person will never
become a morning person.
If Karolyn and I had known that I was a morning person and she was a night person, and if we hadused our dating time to discuss this personality difference, we would have saved ourselves a lot of emotional pain. I would not have felt rejected because she was not having breakfast with me, and shewould not have felt controlled by my insisting that she go to bed at 10 p.m. Yes, I wish we had knownthat personality differences profoundly influence behavior.
Settle individual differences
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#yearofvictory
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Is there hope for this couple?
Certainly, if they choose to respect their differences and negotiate a solution. For example, thenight person may agree to have sex at 10 p.m. if the morning person will allow them to leave the
bedroom after love-making and pursue their other interests until midnight. However, if the morningperson insists that the night person remain in bed after making love, that person may feel manipulated,controlled, and frustrated. A morning person will never become a night person, and a night person
will never become a morning person. It’s a part of our personality. With effort, we can push
ourselves to be functional in those early or late hours that are not prime time for us. But it will nev�er without an effort.
#Amos3:3
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#yearofvictory
#lightilluminates
#Blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Neither of us knew before marriage that there are "morning persons" and there are "night persons:" Morning persons awake with the enthusiasm of a kangaroo, springing to face the day with the excitement, while the night person hides under the covers and thinks, "They must be playing a game-no one can be that excited in the morning."
Night persons have their "prime time" from 10p.m. until... That's when they enjoy reading, painting, playing games, doing anything that demands a lot of energy, while the morning person is quickly fading at that hour.
This personality difference may have a profound impact upon the couple's sexual relationship. The morning person wants to go to bed at ten, cuddle, and make love, while the night person is saying, "You have got to be kidding. I can't go to bed this early." The morning person may feel rejected, while the night person feels like they are being controlled. This may lead to arguments and frustration. Is there hope for this couple?
#Amos3:3
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#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#lightilluminates
#Blessedday
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
On the other hand, before we got married Karolyn had visions of what the two of us would do between 10pm and midnight. Her visions included reading and discussing books, watching movies together, playing intellectually stimulating games, and discussing the deeper issues of life. What she did not know was that my physical, emotional, and intellectual motor shut down at 10pm. The possibility of my carrying on an intelligent conversation was greatly diminished after that hour. It is true while we were courting, I stayed alive and engaged her till midnight. But I pushed along the euphoric feelings of "being in love." The excitement of being with her and doing things together kept the adrenalin flowing, and she had no idea that this would not continue after we were married.
(Can you see that, it happens to us all.)
#Amos3:3
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#yearofvictory
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
No one questions the axiom that we are all unique. The question is, how unique? I wish I'd known that personality (those characteristics that make us unique) would profoundly affect our marriage.
Before we got married, I dreamed about how wonderful it would be to get up every morning and have breakfast with my wife. After we got married, I found out that Karolyn didn't do mornings. Breakfast was not her "thing." Upon reflection I did remember that during the dating years, she told me, "Don't call me in the mornings. I'm not responsible for what I say or do before noon." I took it as a joke and laughed. I never called her in the morning because I was busy "doing my own things."
After marriage I discovered that she was serious. My dream of a quiet romantic breakfast with my wife was shattered in the first month of our marriage. I was left to eat breakfast in silence, except for the songs the birds were singing outside the window.
#Amos3:3
#uniquebeings
#anniesentcares
#Dominion2018
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#lightilluminates
#Blessedday
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Matt agreed to give up Sunday morning golf and began attending church with Jill. Jill agreed that she would join him looking for a church that he would find more engaging. They found such a church, and together, they are deeply involved not only in attendance but are involved weekly in teaching a fifth-grade children's class.
Incidentally, they now a three-year old son. Both agree that they are glad they found a meeting place in their Spiritual journey before their son was born.
Religious beliefs are often accompanied by strong emotions and deeply held convictions. Even atheists often hold their non-God views tenaciously, and those beliefs affect the way they approach life. In that sense, though they deny the existence of God, they are deeply religious.
Because our religious beliefs affect all of life, it is very important that we explore the foundation of spiritual COMPATIBILITY before we make the commitment to marriage.
I hope this chapter will help you do that.
Ponder on the following.
1) What are the basic religious beliefs of my parents?
2) Where am I on my spiritual journey?
3) How do my religious beliefs affect my daily lifestyle?
4)Do you think you hold enough in common to build spiritual intimacy in your Marriage?
Book Review continues Next Week by God's grace
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
For many couples in relationship, spirituality is an unexplored topic. They simply assume that this area of life will take care of itself after marriage. Others who openly discuss matters of spirituality often ignore the warning signs. They are so in love with each other, enjoy being with each other, and can use themselves making each other happy for the rest of their lives, and they close their eyes to huge differences in their lives, and they close their eyes to huge differences in their views of spirituality.
Jill and Matt, the couple we met at the beginning of this chapter, eventually discovered spiritual intimacy. After several counseling sessions in which I helped them listen to the heart of the other person and try to understand how important this issue is to them, they were able to affirm each other's concerns and become friends instead of enemies.
Once they moved from an adversarial relationship to a relationship to a friendship where two people were trying to understand each other and solve a conflict rather than win an argument, the resolution became rather easy.
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Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
I remember the young lady who said to me, "I've been in a relationship with Andrew for three years. When we started, he told me that he was a Christian. We have many common interests and we have many wonderful times together. But I realized that we are not marching to the beat of the same drummer when it comes to spirituality. For him, Christianity is a religion; something you do on Sunday but it has little relevance to how he makes decisions and lives his life. For me Christianity is my life. Nothing is more important to me than investing my life in serving Christ. I realize that we don't have the spiritual foundation on which to build a Christian marriage. Therefore I am breaking off our relationship."
I think this young lady is extremely mature. If after 3years she had seen little spiritual movement on his part to become more personally involved in his relationship with God, to think that we could CHANGE AFTER MARRIAGE WOULD BE NAIVE. Three years later, she married a young man who had a similar level of commitment to his faith in Christ and the two of them are in the process of building a truly Christian Marriage.
LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP.
#Amos:3:3
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#wisdommatters
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Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
WHAT KIND OF "CHRISTIAN"?
Thus far, I have been talking about theological differences in faith and practice, but now let me turn to the personal side.
We clearly recognize that there are different levels of commitment among Christians. For example, some people who call themselves Christians attend church only during the Easter and Christmas holidays. Other than those holidays, their religion tends to influence them very little. On the other hand, there are many who attend church on a regular basis. For some, it is once in a week event...,some believe in regular worship...
Thus, it becomes extremely important to discover what kind of Christian you are in a relationship with.
What is thier level of commitment and involvement in the Christian community? How important is their faith to them? And what kind of impact does it have on their personal life?
It should be obvious that an Easter-Christmas Christian is very different from a daily "quite-time" Christian.
Watch out before marriage.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
EXPLORING 80 BRANCHES
Inasmuch as 80% of the population of the United States claims Christianity as their religion and inasmuch as this is my own personal religious heritage, let me explore with my Christian readers additional issues that I think need to be addressed before decision to marry.
There are three major branches of Christiendom. Eastern Orthodoxy, Roman Catholicism, and Protestantism.
While these three agree on certain core beliefs, such as Divinity of Christ, His sacrificial death, and His resurrection from the dead, they disagree on many other issues.
If you are contemplating marriage to someone outside your own Christian tradition, i urge to explore both the traditions and seek to negotiate your differences. To marry simply because you are "in love" and to ignore the implications of these spiritual differences are signs are immaturity... Assuming that both are members of the same Christian tradition, it is time to examine the finer points of belief and practice.
These differences need to be fully explored if you are contemplating marriage.
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
It has been my observation that many people come to adulthood never having explored their own spiritual beliefs system.
Personally, they've not explored the fundamental beliefs of their religion. Note that we do not choose our family, and the religion, into which we are born. But as adults, we have the responsibility to seek truth in all areas of life. If you realize that your religion is simply cultural artifact, I would encourage you to take the time to explore the history and beliefs of your religious heritage and discuss your journey openly with the person you are in relationship with.
If you cannot be honest and open about your religious beliefs before marriage, you are not likely to does after marriage and your religious beliefs will likely become a source of conflict.
#Amos:3:3
#genesis1
#hebrews1
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
What Do You Think About God?
So what are the issues that need to be looked at?
First, there is one's concept of God. The
Hebrew scriptures begin with these words: "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. A few paragraphs later read, "So God created human beings in his own image, in the image of God he created them; make and female he created them."
ARE THESE WORDS TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY?
IS THERE A TRANSCENDENT, POWERFUL CREATOR WHO NOT ONLY CREATED THE UNIVERSE BUT MADE MAN IN HIS IMAGE?
OR IS IT SIMPLY TO BE TAKEN AS AN HEBREW MYTHOLOGY?
Your answer to those questions will have a profound impact on your self-perception and how you live your life. If you agree that God exist as the creator and sustainer of the universe, the next question is "Has God spoken?"
The Christian scriptures affirm, "In the past God spoke to our forefathers through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom he made the universe. The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful words. After he had provided purification for sins he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty in heaven:"
WHAT HAS HE SAID AND HOW HAVE I RESPONDED TO HIS MESSAGE?
These are fundamental questions that need to be answered honestly.
#Amos:3:3
#genesis1
#hebrews1
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#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Matt and Jill were one of many couples who have sat in my office over the years and shared the conflicts over their religious beliefs. And yet spirituality is often the last thing to be discussed in marriage relationships today.
Infact many couples never get around to discuss their religious beliefs at all. As a counselor, I find this extremely disappointing.
In anthropology, it is believed that man is incurably religious and religious beliefs greatly influence the behavior of those who believe them.
Therefore, when couples are contemplating marriage, religion needs to be near the top of the list in matters that need to be discussed.
Are our spiritual beliefs compatible?
Are we marching the beat of the same drummer?
Few things have the potential for causing marital conflict more than divergent spiritual views. That is why most world religions encourage their adherents to marry within their religious tradition.
In the Christian faith, the scripture admonish, "Do not unequally yoked together with unbelievers:
for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness?
and what communion hath light with darkness?
And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols?
for ye are the temple of the living God..."
These questions are cogent and wise couple will not avoid them.
#Amos:3:3
#2corinthians6:14-16
#goodmorning
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Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
For Jill (Matt's husband), the issue seemed to be attending church versus not attending church. However,attached had a totally different perspective on spirituality. He did not grow up attending church. While a student at the University, he had become involved in a student-led organization. After several months of attending meetings, and reading the Bible and other Christian books, he had come to consider himself a Christian. While he and Jill were in a relationship, he attended church with her every Sunday and found it interesting. But now that he was out of college and working full-time, he found the church services to be much predictable and did not find the sermons to be very helpful. He sincerely felt closer to God on the golf course than he did at church. He could not understand why attending church was such a big deal for Jill.
On the other hand, Jill was devastated. Attending church with other christians was one of the tents of her faith. It was unthinkable that a good Christian would not go to church. "What will we do when we have children?" She asked. "I can't bear the thought of my children not going to church." I could tell that Matt was getting frustrated.
"Jill, we don't have children," he said. "We can cross that bridge when we get there."
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#happynewweek
#blessedday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Nine months after the wedding, Jill and Matt say in my office, Jill said, "We've got a problem and we don't know how to solve it." So, what's the problem?" I inquired.
"Matt doesn't want to go to church with me anymore. He says that church is boring and that he feels closer to God on the golf course than he does in church. So for the last month, he drives off to the golf course while I drive to church. It doesn't seem right to me. I never dreamed that this would happen.
"Before we got married, Matt went to church with me every Sunday. He always seemed to like it. We discussed the sermons. He told me that he was a Christian, but how can you be a Christian and not want to go to church? He says that I'm judging him and maybe I am. But deeply hurt and I'm beginning to feel that maybe we made a mistake by getting married."
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#happynewweek
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
HYMN
1. My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus' name.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
2. When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
GRACED RECIPE
"Inferiority complexity can lead wrong decisions as relationships."
My advice, "Don't look down on yourself."
You are unique and special.
Hope in God and you will laugh best.
#johnstainer1873
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil.
GRACED RECIPE
The fear of the Lord retrains us from ALL appearances of evil which include sex before marriage (fornication), oral sex, ungodly associations...just to mention a few.
All these cautions does not change God but for our good.
#proverbs6:16
#choosesexualpurity
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#yearofvictory
#songsofvictoryontheway
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."
GRACED RECIPE
You can only enjoy the peace of God when you are living on obedience to his instructions in all the relationships you keep.
No human relationship promises peace outside the godfactor.
Selah!
#philippians4:7
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#yearofvictory
#songsofvictoryontheway
#liveinobedience
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
WORD COUNT
"Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart."
GRACED RECIPE
Learn to RUN from all appearances of evil. It's for the good and safety of your destiny.
Selah!
#1Timothy2:22
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#songsofvictoryontheway
#yearofvictory
#fleefromimmorality
#blessedday
WORD COUNT
"Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered."
GRACED RECIPE
Obtaining the right godly knowledge is a major requirement for all successful relationships.
So, get knowledge.
Book review continues next week by God's grace.
#1Peter3:7
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#yearofvictory
#newsongsontheway
#getknowledge
gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
LEARNING THEIR LOVE LANGUAGE
My final suggestion for maintaining good and positive in-law relationship is to learn the primary love language of your in-laws and speak their love language regularly.
When your in-laws feel genuinely loved, it creates positive climate in which to negotiate differences. Nothing communicates love more deeply than speaking the right love language. When families effectively communicates love, they create positive in-law relationship.
Karolyn's father was deceased before we got married. When I finished graduate studies and moved closer to our families, her mother was my cheer leader. Her love language was acts of service. After I painted the house for her, I could do no wrong. My parents are helpful, positive, and never overbearing. I certainly would not have been prepared to deal with in-law conflicts. Karolyn and I never discussed the subject. I realize now how naive we were. The hundreds of couples who have walked through my counseling office have made me realize that we were the exception. Having good in-law relationship normally requires time and effort.
I'm hoping that this chapter will help two of you surface potential areas of conflict with your extended families and to talk about how you will handle these issues. The more thoroughly you do this before marriage, the less likely you are to be blind-sided once you are married.
Wow! End of chapter 10. See you next week as we move to chapter 11(Spirituality is not to be equated with 'going to church.')
I hope we are still together.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
LEARNING TO NEGOTIATE
The third ingredient to having good relationship with your in-laws is learning to negotiate differences. Negotiation begins by someone making a proposal. Jeremy said to his wife's parents, "I know that you would like us to be here for Christmas day and celebrate with the family. My parents, of course, have the same desire. Because you are 500 miles apart, we know that we can't be at both places on the same day. I'm wondering about alternating between Thanksgiving and Christmas. We could give you guys the Christmas next year, we would reserve the order. I'm just trying to find something that will work for both families."
Jeremy made a proposal. Now his in-laws have the opportunity to accept the proposal of their own. It is the process of listening and respecting each other's ideas that allows the process of negotiation to go forward. Eventually, you reach a solution that everyone can agree eand the relationship with your in-laws is strengthened.
Negotiation is enhanced when you are making requests not demands.
(My thought:Keep the relationship positive despite your reservations)
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Empathetic listening does not require you to agree with other person's ideas, but it does require you to treat them and their ideas with kindness, they are far more likely to respect your ideas and treat you kindly. Mutual understanding and mutual respect grows out of empathetic listening.
When communicating with in-laws, always speak for yourself. Instead of saying, "You hurt my feelings when you said that." When you start your sentence with 'I' you are giving your perspective. When you begin your sentence with "you", you are placing blame and will likely experience a defensive response from your in-laws. The husband who says, "I feel frustrated when Kimberly tells me that every time you talk you mention your husband's problem with alcohol and verbal abuse. I'm wondering if you want us to do something and if so, what do you think we could do?" will likely open the door to a meaningful conversation.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
#happynewmonth
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
Learning to Listen
So, how do you build a positive relationship with your in-laws? I want to suggest that the process begins by learning to listen empathetically. By empathetic listening, I mean listening with a view to understanding what your in-laws think, how they came to that conclusion, and how strongly they feel about it.
By nature, most of us are not good listeners. We often listen long enough to give a rebuttal and we end up in needless arguments. Empathetic listening holds judgement until you are certain that you understand what the person is saying. This involves asking clarifying questions such as, "What I understand you to be saying is... Is that correct?" Or, "It sounds like you are asking me to...is that what you want?" Once you have listened long enough to clearly understand what they are saying and how strongly they feel about it, you are then free to give your perspective on the subject. Because you have listened to them without condemnation, they are far more likely to hear your honest perspective.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
#happynewmonth
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
...Your in-laws will also have expectations... Some of these expectations will have religious overtones. A young wife said, "I found out that when we spend week with his parents, they expect us to go to the church with them on Friday nights even though both of us are christians. I feel very uncomfortable but I don't want to hurt their feelings. I'm wondering if, when they come to visit us, they will go to church with us on Sunday: 'Her husband said, "When we go to visit her folks for a weekend, they expect me to wear a suit when I go to church with them on Sunday morning. We attend contemporary church and I only have one suit that I bought for my grandmother's funeral five years ago. I feel uncomfortable wearing it."
Your in-laws may also have strongly held beliefs that differ from yours. (You need wisdom to balance it.)
Learning to Listen
In these and numerous other areas, you will discover that your in-laws are individuals who have unique thoughts, feelings and desires. These May differ from yours. So how do you build a balance positive relationship with your in-laws?
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
#happynewmonth
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
FIVE KEY ISSUES
...In addition, there will be traditions. One young wife said, "My sister and I have always taken our mother out for dinner on her birthday. Now that we are married, my husband says we don't have money for me to fly back for mum's birthday. I'm finding this really hard to accept. I don't want my mum and sister toward him, but I'm afraid that's what will happen."
A young husband said, " For as long as I can remember, on the fourth of July, my family has a fish fry. The men go fishing early in the morning. It's an all-day event. It's the one time each year that I get to see all of my cousins. My wife thinks that we should spend the day with her parents, but all they do is go out to a restaurant for the evening meal. We could do that anytime: 'Traditions are often undergirded by deep emotions and should never be treated lightly.
Your in-laws will also have expectations. Unless you have spent a great deal of time with them before marriage, you may be blind sided by these expectations.
To be continued next week.
Have a blessed weekend.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
FIVE KEY ISSUES
Normally, the most intimate of these relationship will be with your spouse's parents. Thus, in this chapter, I want to focus on mother-in-law and father-in-law relationships.
One of the first issues that will likely demand your attention is holidays, especially Christmas. In Western culture, more families get together at Christmas than at any other holiday. Often, the problem is that his parents want both of you at their house on Christmas day and her parents want the same. If both live in the same town, that may be possible. If they live in the same state, it could be Christmas Eve at one set of parents and Christmas Day with the other. However if they live several states away, you may have to negotiate Christmas with his parents this year and her parents next year, and spend Thanksgiving (new year) with the parent or parents who won't see you at Christmas. There may be other holidays that will be deemed important for one or both families.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
When you marry, you become part of an extended family. This family may include a mother, a father, a step mother, a step father, brothers, sisters, step brothers, step sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins, nephews, nieces, step children, and perphaps an ex-husband or an ex-wife. You cannot ignore this extended family. They will not go away. Your relationship may be distant or close, positive or negative, but you will have a relationship because you are marrying into a family.
Life is much easier if you can have a positive relationship with this extended family. Your relationship with each of these individuals depends on the opportunities you have to interact with each other. If you live a thousand miles from both of your extended families, then your relationship may be positive but distant. Your opportunities to develop your relationship may be limited to holidays, weddings and family functions. However, if you live in closer proximity, then you may have a great deal of interaction with members of your extended family.
Hope we are learning.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
For over thirty years, couples have sat in my office and made the following complaints:
----> "His mother wants to tell me how to cook. I've been cooking for ten years. I don't need her help."
---> "Her father doesn't like me. He tells his friends that his daughter married down. I guess he wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer. I don't have the heart to tell him that as a plumber, I am making more money than either one of them."
---> "His sister and his mother never include me in their social activities. They invite his brother's wife, but they never invite me."
---> "Her brother is addicted to sports. We don't have much in common. I don't think he has read a book in years and he has no interest in politics."
---> Her father is an accountant. Everytime we are together, he's giving me advice on how to manage our money. Frankly, I don't usually agree with his advice, but I try to be nice."
----> My wife's parents give her money to buy things we can't afford. I resent that. I wish they would let us live our own lives."
(Watch out for comments from family)
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
CHAPTER 10
(Permit me to jump to this chapter)
If you think that after the wedding it will just be the two of you, your thinking is wrong. You are marrying into a family, for better or for worse. Her family does not disappear the day after the wedding. Both parents may allow you to have few days for a honeymoon alone but after that, they will expect to be part of your lives. In some non-western cultures, parental involvement is more pronounced and overt. In some cases, the bride actually moves into the house with her husband and his parents and lives there indefinitely. After all, the dowry has been paid, and she belongs to his family. His mother will teach her how to be the wife he needs. In Western culture, in-law relationship are not rigidly formalized but nonetheless real.
To be continued tomorrow by God's grace
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#newlargefamily
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
Word count:
"Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Book review: Things I wish I'd known before we got married
The final suggestion I wish to make is that you decide before marriage who will keep the books after you are married. The one who "keeps the books" is the one who pays the monthly bills and keeps tabs on the online accounts. This is the person who seeks to keep the two of you on track with the spending plan upon which you have agreed. This does not mean that the one chosen to keep the books is in charge of making financial decisions. Such decisions are to be made as a team.
The bookkeeper may not necessarily remain bookkeeper forever. For one reason or another, you may decide after the first six months that it will be far wiser if the other partner would become the bookkeeper. As a couple discusses financial details, it will usually be obvious which one is more adept at such matters.
However, be certain that the one who is keeping the books know how to do so and has full knowledge regarding various checking and savings accounts. Remember you are a team and both team members must be fully aware of financial details.
It is my desire that the ideas I have shared in this chapter will help the two of you fully discuss and find agreement on the financial plan you will follow once you are married. I wish someone had told me that we needed a financial plan before we got married. I think I would have followed the advice.
End of Chapter 8. Stay blessed till next week.
#Amos:3:3
#goodmorning
#anniesentcares
#newsongsontheway
#songsofvictory
#planyourfinances
#wisdommatters
#garychapman
#favouredday
Gracedrelationshiprecipe@blogspot.com
