01-08-16 CONCLUSION ON HANDLING FIRST LOVE

"Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding. Proverbs 23:23"

True Love is always sincere, cannot die, not harmful and trustworthy. Daniel and Fola's case may seems confusing but its not, if well handled.

Fola needs to be sincere if she can truly carry on with her marriage with Daniel. Her Union with Daniel may lack joy, peace and true commitment if she is not sincere as regards the position of her heart.

Remember, a broken courtship is better than an unhappy/unfulfilled marriage; it better to have a woman whose heart is with you not someone else.

Was there a direction before she entered into the courtship with Daniel? Is her relationship with Gbenga divinely ordained?

First love may be strong yet without joy and fulfilment if it lacks divine backing.

Daniel and Fola must settle the issue of TRUST, LOVE AND COMMITMENT before the marriage.

Thanks for all your opinions, contributions and suggestions. I know we've been able to bless some lives.

'Its not only about first or second love, its about divine choice.'

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Happy new month of Peace
Good morning

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29-07-16 HANDLING FIRST LOVE 4

"Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding. Proverbs 23:23"

We love you all for your comments and counsel to Fola and Daniel. Your response meant so much to us as we share this to bless others out there who found themselves in such situation and are confused.

TOBI
I think Fola should inform Daniel's parents and explain to them all what happened. They should be in d best position to help her. That is if her love for Daniel is genuine.
I think if she can't talk to Daniel as at that time, his parents should be able to do that better after all d begging and pleading.

YEMISI
I believe in every godly relationship, ugly past must be discussed... If that has been done, Daniel should come closer to Fola more than before because it may not be easy for her to avoid Gbenga due to the feelings they both had. Fola should be prayerful to know mind of God on the present issue and go for godly counseling.

Mary
Since Fola failed on her path to tell Daniel about her past relationship and invited Gbenga to her apartment which is not appropriate, the place of prayer and confession can't be overemphasized at this time.
Then, if Daniel has truly met with Christ and has a forgiving spirit as we were told in the story, Fola shouldn't hesitate to see her Pastor or Daniel's pastor or both, to explain things to them, seek their counsel or that of the marriage committee in order to convince Daniel of the genuineness of her apology. These people can still influence Daniel of the truth.
And of course, Fola shouldn't marry Gbenga, except Daniel isn't going back on his decisions. Fola is however free yo marry Gbenga if she's led and convinced.
#my opinion #

Have a blessed day
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28-07-16 HANDLING FIRST LOVE 3

"Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding. Proverbs 23:23"

We bless God for a new day.
Truth may appear difficult but with the existence of the TRUTH in your heart, it will be easier to always know and do the right thing.

We still received some opinions on Fola's issue. Don't hide the truth from your partner please.

Jaiye
At Annie's story...my stakes: God may be at work for the lady in order to marry the right man. Considering the opinions from others, I think mine will counter some points.

I feel she should be able to talk to Daniel and settling it on their own. Daniel should be able to trust his supposed wife. If they can't settle this on their own, How will they settle serious issues after marriage?
She should focus her prayer points on grace not to miss the right man (that is if she is having doubts.)

Boluwatife
I think d lady should try to explain everything to Daniel. She should have told him about the other guy before, that is why we should open to ourselves during courtship so there won't be problems like this.

If after explanations and pleadings, Daniel is still not forthcoming, she should leave everything to God, if he's meant for her, he will come back and if not, Gbenga maybe the right guy.

By the grace of God, godly professional counselors will also give us their opinion on this matter before the last series.
Have a great day.

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Thanks

27-07-16 HANDLING FIRST LOVE2

"Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding. Proverbs 23:23"

Wow! We had responses based on opinions, suggestions and all. Although, they are easier written or read than done, but I will encourage us to always do the right thing.
Let's share some:

To my own opinion and suggestions, I think the sister should travail in prayer and commit things to God's hands cos with God all things are possible and I believe Daniel will listen to her own side of the story and moreover before they get too close to each other they should have unveiled their past to each other because it's normal that Daniel reacted in such a way since he was once into it before he got saved.  I believe if Daniel is the will of God for her he will surely stay. But my own advise to her is never to go back to her first love cos she never can predict the kind of person he is now. May God help her.
BUKOLA

Hmm! I believe Fola should have told Daniel about Gbenga before the time. And since she knows how she loved Gbenga then, she shouldn't have allowed any private discussion between the two of them alone in the room. The solution now is to pray to God first to take the heart of Daniel for her and then apologize to him. I believe with that, if Daniel truly loves her, he will surely forgive her.
BOLA

Fola will surely explain to Daniel and the wedding will still hold while Gbenga will move back to Abroad...
Synonymous

Could Gbenga be the destined man for Fola? Hmm!
See you tomorrow with more reactions as to how we can handle the sudden appearance of first love.

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26-07-16 HANDLING FIRST LOVE

"Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint. Proverbs 25:19"

Its a beautiful day in a blessed week because everything created by God is good. We do not own ourselves, so we move whenever He instructs.

Relationship Recipe was not broadcasted yesterday because there was no proper preparation for it. Please bear with us.

This week, by the help of the Almighty God, we will be realistic about the issue of FIRST LOVE. Some finds it difficult to start another relationship even when there is break in communication with the man/woman they first loved and we've also seen failed marriages resulting to the reunion first loves.
"Can you then TRUST someone still nursing the wound from his/her first love?"

Daniel was once an unbeliever who lived a reckless life. He defiled so many careless girls, but he was blessed to have met Christ in his University days. He became transformed as he started living a new life.
Folakemi was born into a Christian family, her parents had instilled in  her the  fear of God and she had kept herself sexually pure. She met with Gbenga during her orientation program as a fresh student in the University; Gbenga helped her so well when she had certain difficulties during her registration, so both became close. They developed a friendship that was more than a mere friendship.
Folakemi so much liked Gbenga and they planned taking their love life to the marriage level.

After their degree program, Gbenga travelled out of the country and they both lost contact. Fola was heartbroken because she loved Gbenga so much but time healed her broken heart.
The path of Fola and Daniel then crossed and they entered into a serious relationship with marriage in view. They had their introduction ceremony and already picked a date for their wedding when the path of  Fola and Gbenga crossed again. Gbenga decided to have a serious chat with Fola in her room, a self-contain apartment. Gbenga told her the reason they lost contact and that he still very much loved her and he came back in search for her. Fola was moved to tears with Gbenga's story how Gbenga had made effort to look for her all to no avail and he decided to come into the country to look for her. They hugged each other tightly out of past emotions and love, with tears in their eyes and immediately Daniel opened the door of the room and saw Gbenga about placing a kiss on Fola's forehead as they hugged.
He couldn't believe his eyes that his fiancee whom he trusts so much and about to wed, is in another man's arms. He barged out of the room.

Fola was dazed, she knew she is in for a great trouble because her fiance is so stubborn, he wouldn't listen to her. She told Gbenga everything. All her effort to clean up the mess proved futile, Daniel was so much disappointed and heart broken in his Saint Fola who wouldn't dare shake another guy talk less of hugging him. He had thought she is just a deadly hypocrite and he wanted the wedding cancelled.

At this juncture, your counsel is needful. God bless you.

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24-07-16 COMMITMENT 5

"Commit thy way unto the LORD; Trust also in HIM; and he shall bring it to pass". Psalm 37:5.

We appreciate all those who shared this series on different social media, also those who responded to the issue.
Let's go through our questions once again:

Is it appropriate to open a joint bank account with our fiance/fiancee, so that we can save money ahead of our future? Can I commit my huge business/ministry to the hands of my partner while I travel for a programme outside the country? At what stage can I be totally trust and be committed?

The first step/stage is that you define purpose with your partner, with adequate time frame, most importantly, with the help of the Holy Spirit.

Be sure, ready and determined to journey with him/her for the rest of your life; Duly informed God, your mentors and parents of your courtship if not, you are not secured, and  FEAR can knock you out at anytime.

Joint savings and business ahead of the wedding plans and home is good, it enhance trust, seriousness and commitment.
Your finance/business will be safe with your partner, either you are around or not once both of you established your goal and objectives with adequate time frame, but it is wisdom to carry someone close along with whatever you're doing (your mentor, family or trusted friend); all these are achievable when the purpose of your relationship is well defined.

Be trustworthy and committed in your courtship so as to reap success, peace and fulfilment.

Commit the journey first to God and He will bring it to PASS.

I love you
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23-07-16 COMMITMENT

"Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass". Psalm 37:4-5

Trust is not to be handled with levity in all relationships. You have to first Trust God before your delight in men.
Trust in God and the desires of your heart according to His Will will be settled.
The man in question is a new convert and needs more knowledge of the word of God for decision making, but we could see that the ultimate desire of his heart is getting a Christian woman. The best way to approach such is not just to pick a church worker for speedy growth and trust. 'Its easy to trust your partner when you are sure God is involved and His word will surely be fulfilled, though it tarried.'

TOSIN said:
Another thing to be considered is, has she met his parent? If she has the backing of God and his parent with good communication, then she should seek God's direction and inform her pastor/counselor.

YEMISI also mentioned that:
If both of them begin their journey with God, Shade should go back to God for assistant. she should pour out her mind to him and avoid filthy communication with friends that can mislead God's purpose for her. Lastly both partner should be prayerful and works towards settling down.

We will conclude tomorrow as God helps us to shed more light on this issue.

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Good Morning

Enjoy your weekend